How to get people to say yes easily!

To get people to say yes..

According to research at Stanford University, people tend to grossly underestimate how likely others are to agree to requests for help. And many don't know how to ask for help. They also overestimate how many people will come to them for help.

The seminar is fascinating and with useful and interesting facts. Here are some key points:

1. It is awkward for the Asker to make a request while it is not for the Askee. Instead it is hard for the Askee to say no. So while the Asker is thinking of all the reasons why they might be turned down, the Askee is thinking of how they can actually help out and make the other person feel good.

People consistently thought it would be nice as hard to get people to say yes to a request, even those experienced in asking!

2. When there are low rates of usage in a program, in this case a mentoring program where new hires need to ask executives to be their mentor, the executives think that the program isn't useful because adoption rates are low. Meanwhile the real issue is that it is hard for new hires to ask. What normally happens is that the program is axed because it's not deemed as effective.

3. Ask directly. People are less likely to help if it is vague. In other examples, low rates of donations to a grocery charity were from the cashiers not asking people if they wanted to donate and instead just relying on a sign.

4. People who declined you in previous request are actually MORE likely to say "yes" because they have a natural tendency to avoid saying no.

Here are the relevant applications in a nut shell:

1. Just ask! People will say yes more often than you think. Put aside your worry.
2. Ask "can you do me a favor?" and then make your request. Most people will answer "yeah sure, what is it?" and this builds pre-commitment. In fact, positive answers are 87% vs. not asking "can you do me a favour" at 57%
3. Ask directly. Remember that the other person is trying to see how they can avoid saying no.
4. Include those who have previously declined you.